New Lenten Blog...Kind Of

I'm doing something different with our youth group this year during Lent. Instead of handing out costly paper devotionals I'm jumping on the trendy-train and doing a daily Lenten blog for my students. Maybe they won't read it (like the devotionals I handed out last year) but I thought I might as well try.

Unfortunately this idea just struck me the other day so I didn't develop a long-term plan for a direction of this blog and as such the blog will likely change, grow, and develop throughout the Lenten season - especially as I receive feedback from my students. My initial plan is to poach information from the Asbury Readers that I edited while I was in seminary and add in some of my own thoughts for clarity. I also plan to explore various topics that come up that need some explanation so it might not be as systematic and ordered as I like. I guess we'll see how it goes. But you can bank on the fact that there will be a lot of scripture and quotes from the saints!

Since I'll be focusing a lot on that for the next 40+ days my posting on this blog might be a bit more sparse than it normally would be during the Lenten season (even though I just returned after a busy season at work). I may cross-post a few things but I'll try to keep that to a minimum. Fear not, I will return and I will eventually post the thoughts I've promised (*cough* filioque *cough*).

If you'd like to follow along with this feel free. The only thing that I ask is that if you read along over there try not to get into a theological discussion in the comments. Feel free to comment a bit since it might help the students feel free to engage but I don't want to scare my students away. =) If you have comments or questions email me or comment over here. My students are smart, but they're still learning the faith (as we all are). I'm trying to challenged them as much as I can without completely overwhelming all of them and it is very hard to try to write for students in grades 6-12 all at the same time.

The address is: http://saintlukeyouth.wordpress.com

May we all see Christ more clearly this Lenten season!

- Ben

Lenten Quote

I just read this quote from St. John Chrysostom in a book I'm using for Lent and I thought I'd share it. I know it's not Lent yet, but this starts earlier than Ash Wednesday.

When the fast begins, let us get ready and polish our spiritual weapons; as cultivators, let us sharpen our sickles; as sailors, let us order our thoughts against the waves of extravagant desires; as travelers, let us set out on the journey towards heave; and as wrestlers let us strip for the contest. For the Christian is at the same time a solider, a sailor, a plower and a wrestler. St. Paul states, 'We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against the powers of evil. Put on therefore the whole armor of God.'

Put on the spiritual armor, and become a soldier. Strip yourself of worldly cares, for the season of Lent is one of wrestling. Cultivate your soul. Cut away the thorns of evil. Sow the word of godliness. Subdue the body, and bring it into subjection. Keep down the waves of evil desires. Repel the tempest of evil thoughts.

- St. John Chrysostom.

Let us keep these wise words from St. Chrysostom dear to our hearts as we approach this most holy season.

By the Waters of Babylon

Lent, my favorite time of the year, is quickly approaching. I think I love the season of Lent so much because it places my sin, my weakness, my mortality, and my deep need for God at the forefront of my mind. The fasting inconveniences my life and challenges me to think of God at every turn and helps the increased devotional reading pierce my soul in ways it normally wouldn't.

I really do love Lent because it prepares me for Easter and helps me to clearly see my God. I think there may be no greater travesty among Protestants than the slow removal of Lent from our calendars.

During seminary while I attended St. Athanasius Orthodox Church I heard one of the most wonderfully piercing Lenten hymns I've ever experienced. This hymn brings me to tears every time I hear it because it reminds me of deep ravine that separates who I am from what I am called to become by the grace of God. I was reminded about this hymn today on an Orthodox blog that I often read - Glory to God for All Things. This is the blog of Fr. Stephen Freeman and it is a wonderful wealth of wisdom and spirituality.

The hymn that I'm talking about is "By the Waters of Babylon" and is based on Psalm 137. Here is are a few of the lyrics re-posted from Fr. Stephen's post (here).

By the waters of Babylon we sat down and wept, when we remembered Zion. Alleluia.
We hanged our harps upon the willows in the midst thereof. Alleluia.
For there they that had taken us captive required of us a song;
and they that had carried us away required of us a hymn, saying, Sing us one of the songs of Zion. Alleluia.
How shall we sing the Lord’s song in a strange land? Alleluia.
If I forget thee, O Jerusalem, let my right hand be forgotten. Alleluia.
If I do not remember thee, let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth; if I prefer not Jerusalem as my chief joy. Alleluia.

How does this Psalm bespeak of Lent? It tells of the exile of Jerusalem and how they chose to worship God even when they were separated and driven from the true place they belonged. It reminds us of our condition that we meditate strongly on during Lent - that we too are exiled. We must keep our hope, we must continue to sing the Lord's song even in this strange land.

So let us prepare ourselves for this Lenten journey. Let us ready ourselves that we might truly embrace the fast and let us sing the Lord's song even as we remember our sin, our mortality, and our exile from Eden.

Glory to Jesus Christ!

- Ben

If you're interested there is a great Lenten "pastoral note" by Fr. Justin Paterson at the top of the St. Athanasius web-page (here). You can also scroll down if you are interested in learning more about Eastern Christian fasting practices during Lent.

Glorious Feast!

Today the church exhorts us to join in a great paradox of feasting even in the midst of our Lenten fasting since today is the feast of the Annunciation. Today is the day that we celebrate and remember that glorious day when the Angel Gabriel came to the Virgin and proclaimed:

Greetings, favored one! The Lord is with you...Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And now you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give to him the throne of the his ancestor David. He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end....The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be holy; he will be called Son of God....For nothing will be impossible with God. (Luke 1:30-33,35,37 NRSV)

Today is the day when we can see the full spectrum of our salvation. We look ahead to Good Friday when we remember our Lord's death, and we even glance beyond Good Friday longingly looking toward Easter Sunday, the feast of feasts, when we celebrate our Lords glorious resurrection. We look ahead like this today as we think of the angel's visitation to the Virgin. We recognize today, maybe more fully than at any other point, that our Lord came as a child to die and rise again for us and for our salvation.

The Lord and maker of the heavens, he who is uncontainable humbled himself so much that he allowed himself to take on flesh and to be contained in a womb. He who knows the expanse of the universe and who spoke to the darkness at creation is the same incarnate word that came and took on flesh as a fetus (if such an impersonal word can be used). We celebrate this day the incorporeal Son, the second person of the Trinity, taking on flesh so that humanity may be united to God. We rejoice in the fact that Christ our God took on every part of what it means to be human and yet was without sin. Our Lord took upon himself not only our flesh, but also our will - assuming everything that is intrinsic to us, for as St. Basil states: "that which was not assumed cannot be redeemed."

Today we also remember Mary's response to the Angel: "Here am I, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word" (Luke 1:38). We remember that her response was a free choice and that it was not forced upon her. In this same way we remember that we are called to emulate her and to respond to God daily with the same words. Theotokos, the God-bearer, that is the title given to Mary by the early church, not as a sign of her exultation but to proclaim the mystery we celebrate today that God himself, in the person of the Son chose to be born. The uncreated one who is without beginning chose to unite himself to humanity so thoroughly that we can say with confidence that Mary bore God in her womb. To say this statement is hard and absurd is true, and yet it is also beautiful in the truth it proclaims. Christ is the fullness of God, and yet also the fullness of humanity and today we proclaim his love. We can see this love clearly as we remember his incarnation and look toward the cross and resurrection.

Glory to God in the Highest! Our redemption is at hand, for Christ our God is conceived in the womb of the virgin so that he may cleanse us from our sin.


Sadly this holy-day is forgotten in most of Protestantism probably due to a number of reasons, chief of which may be (and I'm just offering a hypothesis here) connected to the staunch rejection of anything having to do with the Virgin Mary at the time of Luther's reformation. I believe it would do us well to remember this day with our Catholic and Orthodox brothers and sisters. I believe this feast helps us to think more accurately about the incarnation of our Lord. It helps us to avoid the heresy of adoptionism and some gnostic tendencies that run deep in some of our traditions.

So let us today join with our Catholic and Orthodox friends and boldly sing the praises of God. For today we can see both the incarnation and the crucifixion/resurrection clearly. Let us praise God for his redemption of humanity for today we celebrate the coming of grace as the Son of God becomes the Son of the Virgin!

The Ladder, The Watchmen, and The Saint of Ireland

As I've noted before Kristy and I are reading St. John Climacus' The Ladder of Divine Ascent as a Lenten reading and let me say that even though we're still slowly working our way through the introduction by Bishop Kallistos Ware the book is well worth your time. Just like I stated about the SVS Press edition of St. Athanasius' On The Incarnation (here) this book is worth your time for the introduction alone. The reason it's taken us a few days to get through the introduction is that for the most part it has been very edifying and spiritually challenging (that and I've been a slacker and slothful in my reading at times). Granted I'm making assumptions just based on the introduction but I think this book, except for one part so far, if very accessible to the Protestant paradigm and is an excellent book in regards to the disciplined spiritual life.

At risk of jumping topics too abruptly I went to see the new movie Watchmen the other day and it led to some interesting thoughts. First let me say that I can't fully endorse the movie because it does contain nudity and some graphic violence. It also purports a philosophical worldview that is distinctly different from the Christian worldview. It is because of this last reason that I bring up the movie. While the movie was visually stunning I think it mainly held my attention for the whole 2 hours and 40 some minutes because of the philosophical claims and critiques it was making.

While I'm not trying to give away the movie, it seemed to constantly reiterate the fact that humanity in its essence is violent, perverse, and evil. It seemed to me that this is the central point around which the plot revolved. The suggestion seemed to be made that not only is humanity as a whole this way, but that individuals in their true self are also this way. My first thought was that this movie was offering some sort of Nihilistic philosophy, though I'm not certain that nihilism is the correct term. Either way it paints a world-view that is utterly hopeless and discounts the entire value of humanity. Humanity, so the movie seems to suggest, needs saved from itself by this band of super heroes.

While I know many theologians would probably agree with this depraved view of humanity this seemed to go well beyond the normal Calvinistic view of depravity. I apologize for not being able to accurately describe this but it has been a few very busy days since I saw the film. I would of course agree without reservation that humanity needs salvation and needs to be redeemed, however, I couldn't also help but think through a conversation I had about the "true self." I blogged (here) about this conversation way before I came to seminary and while I'm sure I would articulate things differently now I think I probably agree with it.

I also couldn't help but think throughout the film about some things that I had just read in the introduction of the Ladder. Bishop Kallistos states about John Climacus (italics mine):

Concerning the fall and the resulting distortion of human nature, John is indeed highly negative, although never sweepingly condemnatory in the manner of Augustine or Calvin; he nowhere suggests that the fall has led to a total corruption. But when he speaks about the condition prior to the fall - about humankind's true and natural state, which in Christ we can now regain - he is not only affirmative but optimistic. John is no Manichaean. Human nature in its entirety, body as well as soul, is God's creation and is therefore good: 'God neither caused nor created evil.' Sin is extrinsic to our true personhood: 'No one wants to sin against God.' There are many natural virtues, but no natural vices:

[he then quotes St. John Climacus:]
"evil or passion is not something naturally implanted in things. God is not the creator of passions. On the other hand there are many natural virtues that have come to us from Him"
[end quote of Climacus]

- and these include the highest virtues of all, faith, hope, and love.

It is the tension between these two drastically different views of humanity that I constantly thought about throughout the movie. Just like I have been teaching my confirmation class in recent weeks. While scripture teaches us sin and death entered the world through the Fall, the image of God in which we were created was in no means utterly destroyed. Sure it was marred or tarnished, but not utterly destroyed. There is hope, not that we can redeem ourselves, but that through Christ the image of God can be fully restored so that we may have communion with the divine.

Maybe I'm misinterpreting the philosophy present in the movie so I welcome comments and critiques.



On to St. Patrick, Enlightener of the Celts (ca. 385-464).

I would surely be remiss to blog this morning without mentioning St. Patrick of Ireland. While St. Patrick's Day has sadly been reduced to a time to wear green, drink green drinks, and look for leprechauns it is still good for us to celebrate the holy saint that helped to bring the gospel to the Ireland and who's work still has lasting impact.

While I'm not sure why we remember four-leaf clovers on St. Patrick's day, he is commonly remembered in icons as holding a shamrock or three-leaf clover. It was this clover that he commonly used to teach the doctrine of the Trinity to the Celtic people. Patrick was a devout defender of the faith even in the face of the many pagan tribes throughout the land. We've all heard stories of the Druidic religions of the Celtic region, and it was Patrick who brought the light of the Trinity to this dark place. I've always been awestruck by how beautifully Trinitarian celtic theology has been. This is no doubt largely due to St. Patrick and his work among these people. Praise the Lord for holy men and women like St. Patrick.

While I've not read much of his written works (none until this morning) I leave you with a quote from St. Patrick from his confessions (here). I found this work via my friend Matt Perkins' blog (here). He has a great St. Patrick quote on there that is worth checking out.

St. Patrick in his confessions tells of his zeal for the Lord:

Therefore may it never befall me to be separated by my God from his
people whom he has won in this most remote land. I pray God that he
gives me perseverance, and that he will deign that I should be a
faithful witness for his sake right up to the time of my passing.

And if at any time I managed anything of good for the sake of my
God whom I love, I beg of him that he grant it to me to shed my blood
for his name with proselytes and captives, even should I be left
unburied, or even were my wretched body to be torn limb from limb by
dogs or savage beasts, or were it to be devoured by the birds of the
air, I think, most surely, were this to have happened to me, I had
saved both my soul and my body. For beyond any doubt on that day we
shall rise again in the brightness of the sun, that is, in the glory of
Christ Jesus our Redeemer, as children of the living God and co-heirs
of Christ, made in his image; for we shall reign through him and for
him and in him.

For the sun we see rises each day for us at [his] command, but it
will never reign, neither will its splendour last, but all who worship
it will come wretchedly to punishment. We, on the other hand, shall not
die, who believe in and worship the true sun, Christ, who will never
die, no more shall he die who has done Christ's will, but will abide
for ever just as Christ abides for ever, who reigns with God the Father
Almighty and with the Holy Spirit before the beginning of time and now
and for ever and ever. Amen.

Lord, give us zeal for you and love for the lost of this world like your holy saint Patrick.

- Ben

Ash Wednesday

Today, marks the beginning of Lent for those of us who follow the western ecclesial calendar. Today is a day that we receive ashes on our foreheads to remind us of our mortality. From dust we were created and one day to dust we will return.

Unless our Lord returns beforehand we will all die. While it may be considered morbid by some to think on our looming death it is actually a long standing Christian teaching that we should remember our mortality. The fathers teach through the ages to think on our mortality not only on this day, but all days.

This teaching is hard, but it is good for us to remember our mortality not in a morbid "goth" sort of way, but so that we may place ourselves in proper perspective. We think on our death so that we may remember that we are not God and so that we may live every moment, treat every encounter, and think every thought like it may be our last. This practice helps us to cast out the sin in our life and embrace a life that is full of love and glorifying to God.

So let us begin our Lenten journey today and let us remember our mortality so that we may live truly dispassionate lives daily casting off the passions that cause us to sin. And so we as we receive ashes let the lenten prayer of St. Ephrem the Syrian remind us of the passions we seek to throw off and the virtues we seek to embrace.

O Lord and Master of my life, take from me the spirit of sloth, despair, lust of power, and idle talk. But give rather the spirit of chastity, humility, patience, and love to Thy servant. Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own transgressions, and not to judge my brother, for blessed art Thou, unto ages of ages. Amen.

By the Power of Grayskull!

Yes, I did just quote He-Man. I used to love He-Man so much, in fact, that according to my mom I used to run around the house shouting "By the power of Grayskull!" I guess this is only fitting that I now work in Castle Grayskull.

The other day I was riding in a car with our Associate Pastor and our Director of Contemporary Arts and mentioned off the cuff that our church building sort of looked like Castle Grayskull. The more I thought about this I wondered if I was right and so today in a moment of distraction I did some image comparison and concluded that do indeed work in the Castle Grayskull.

Here is the wikipedia entry for Castle Grayskull, it has about the best image I can find of it.

Compare this with the image of the outside of my church found on our website (here).

If you envision the picture of our church taken from the same perspective the image of Grayskull is drawn I think it fits. Even if it doesn't, I don't care. I am going to continue to think that I work in Grayskull because it is stinking awesome!

On a more theological note:

Western Lent begins in 2 days are you ready? I'm still trying to figure out how I'm going to eat all my leftovers in the fridge that have meat in them before Ash Wednesday. I hope to blog quite a bit during Lent since Kristy and I are planning on reading The Ladder of Divine Ascent together (if our copies ever get here). The book is written by a monk for other monks and is suppose to be full of wisdom on spiritual growth. We'll see how it goes.

- Ben

In preparation of Lent

Yes, Lent is right around the corner. For those of us who follow the Western church calendar this years lenten season begins with Ash Wednesday on February 25. This past week it was my turn to write a brief article for our church newsletter. Below is what I wrote to encourage our congregation to begin looking towards lent even though it is a week or two off.

"Acquire a peaceful spirit, and around you, thousands will be saved."
- St. Seraphim of Sarov


Though I didn’t discover the above quote until a few months ago, it has quickly risen to the top of my list of all-time favorites. It reminds me of the call placed upon us by our Savior and God when he told the expert in the law that the greatest commandment was to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matt. 22:37 NIV). But knowing full well that many would seek to find holiness without loving others, our Lord quickly reminded this teacher that the second greatest commandment is like the first, namely, “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matt. 22:39 NIV). John Wesley picked up on this concept when he described Christian Perfection as perfect love for God and neighbor. These two loves are inextricably bound together for those of us who are in Christ. It is, as we love God that we can do nothing other than love our neighbor.

With these words in mind we look forward ever so slightly to realize that the Lenten Spring is coming. In just a few weeks we cast aside that which clutters our vision so that we may clearly see our God and Savior Jesus Christ. That we may descend the way of the Cross so that we may come to a fuller and more true love of God – truly acquiring the peace of God within our hearts. And so my brothers and sisters let us begin our preparation for Lent, so that we may indeed as St. Seraphim of Sarov says; “acquire a peaceful spirit” so that, loving our neighbor as ourselves, thousands around us may be saved.

More Lenten Thoughts

If my recent post entitled "Approaching Lent" provoked some thoughts then check out my friend Nathaniel's blog entry (here).

He, being Orthodox, does a better job than I in describing the Orthodox approach to lent. His post is short and thorough so pop over there and hopefully that will give you a little better understanding of what I'm talking about.

- Ben

Approaching Lent

I know this post may be a little late (seeing as how most of you who are reading this blog have been in Lent for the past 2-3 weeks) but I've been pondering this for a while and figured late is better than never.

A little over a month ago I was in New Orleans on my way back from Mexico and my friends and I decided to take in a Mardi Gras parade (don't worry there was none of the stereotypical decadence). As I sat watching the parade and thinking about the sites from New Orleans that I had seen earlier I began to think about the evolution of Mardi Gras and wondered how it began. I also, and maybe more so, began to contemplate the difference in both Eastern and Western approaches to the pre-Lenten days.

Most of us are fairly familiar with the Western tradition of Mardi Gras and especially Fat Tuesday (I must sadly confess a favorite of mine). Thinking about this tradition I find it interesting that many Western traditions approach a time of intense fasting/drawing near to God with gluttonous and decadent festivals. As I thought about this I wondering if this was the case with Global Catholicism (not that I'm trying to single out our Catholic friends, most merely associate Mardi Gras with Catholicism - even if it is nominal Catholicism) or if this was merely a pocket of American Catholicism that has been syncretized. Is this practice common in France? Italy? Spain? I also wondered about the development of things such as the infamous beads of Mardi Gras. Did they evolve from (heaven forbid) Rosary beads?

As I continued to think about this I thought about the practice of anticipating Lent that I see in the Orthodox Church. I don't see and emphasis akin to Mardi Gras. The Orthodox practice, as far as I understand it, is to approach Lent gradually by emptying one's house of meat two weeks prior to lent (thus there is a week of eating a lot of meat) and then emptying one's house of dairy products one week before lent (thus a week of a lot of milk and cheeses). While this practice could turn into two weeks of gluttony I have yet to see it manifest itself as such. I do admit, however, that my experience is from a very small sample size and I am forced to wonder if these two weeks manifest themselves in Mardi Gras fashion in countries that are more heavily (and possibly nominally) Orthodox such as Russia, Greece, Turkey (though this is just a question not an assertion). If, however, this doesn't manifest itself like Mardi Gras in other places I find the approach to lent in both traditions (Eastern and Western) to be in stark contrast.

I wonder if the difference in approach between the Eastern and Western traditions is founded in a possible difference that the traditions may approach the Law or laws and thus atonement. I confess that I would need to study this more, but I am wondering if the highly juridical and very Anselmic emphasis in the West has led to the laws or rules of the church being see as a hindrance and something that keeps us from fun, enjoyment, etc. While the East with a not so juridical and not as influenced by Anselm approach tends to view law as life-giving and freeing.

In the West we tend to often view the effects of sin like breaking a law and thus something remedied legally. In contrast the East, and I may be wrong, tends to view the ramifications of sin as something more akin to a cancer or disease that is healed. Thus, and I am hypothesizing here, maybe the Western approach is more easily justified because if they break a law they will easily be rectified during Lenten confession and fasting, while in the East the approach differs because they would not want to break a law that is life-giving and thus put the cancerous sin into their souls.

Please let me be clear that I am trying to tread very carefully in that any point of this thought process could be wrong and thus end up being an over generalization or fallacy. But maybe it makes sense. If I'm correct in my assumptions and assertions I do indeed find the Eastern approach to be much more healthy for the Christian and for the Church as a whole.

I hope that is at least moderately clear. I'm just trying to process through some of these thoughts between the two traditions. This is something that I've been pondering for a little while and was more recently brought to the forefront of my mind as my Orthodox friends begin to prepare for lent.

- Ben

Lent: Feasting During the Fast

This lent has been interesting for me. Though I've not had a great many Lenten epiphanies to blog about I think that God is still teaching me good things. Probably the most significant thing I'm learning is how to feast on him while I'm fasting.

The past week or two I've been fighting diligently against a constant bad/angry mood. It's all that I can do to keep from saying or doing something in my angst - something I will likely regret later. My frustration and my "pissyness" (for lack of a better term) seems to be perpetual. I don't want to get into all the reasons for this now, but let us suffice it to say that it is not caused by the Lenten fasting (though a burger would be great right now).

Despite this "funk" the Lord has been my constant help and comfort. The Holy Spirit has sustained me through a few significant things. It seems as if I must constantly feed myself or else I will break. Here is what is sustaining me.

Psalm 103: Bless the Lord, Oh my soul and all that is within me bless his holy name. Bless the Lord, Oh my soul and forget not all his benefits. He forgives all your iniquities and heals all your diseases... The Lord, is compassionate and merciful, long suffering and of great goodness. Bless the Lord Oh my soul.

Though this is not verbatim with the text we sing this Psalm every Sunday in church and is has been my friend and food during this season. My mind and my soul sing it when things are quiet and it is the first thing that I force myself to utter when I feel this angst building.

Psalm 146: Praise the Lord, Oh my soul. I will praise the Lord as long as I live; I will sing praises to my God while I have being. Put not your trust in princes and sons of men, in whom there is no salvation. When his breath departs he returns to his earth. On that very day his plans perish. The Lord, will reign for ever, They God oh Zion to all generations. Now and ever and unto ages of ages Amen.

This psalm is much like the first. although not word for word with the text we sing it every Sunday. It like Psalm 103 often springs forth from within me and sometimes I make is a forced prayer and cry to the Lord.

The Nicene Creed: I won't recap the whole creed here. This is also sung every Sunday at my church and it encourages me and fills my spirit with joy.

Colossians 3:1-4 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of god. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life, appears then you also will appear with him in glory.

We have been memorizing this passage as a chapel team and it has truly sustained me during these periods. This is incredibly ironic because most (if not all) of my frustration and angst comes during times that I'm doing chapel things. I'm not sure if that means anything except that it's interesting.

The Lord's Prayer: Lord teach me how to pray! This is often my cry and then I dive deep into the prayer our savior taught us to pray. This has become a form of strength and spiritual food.

Various prayers: I also find myself scrambling at night when I'm reflecting on the day or even throughout the day for the Lent Reader that Asbury put out. I find myself flipping through the pages and frantically prayer every prayer from every page. I ask the Lord to teach me how to pray some of the prayer and others just gush out from my being. These prayer are from a variety of places: the book of common prayer, various saints (St. Anselm, St. Ephraim), other Christian figures (Mary Fletcher) and I even wrote a few of them for the reader.



These are the things that are sustaining me. These are the things that the Holy Spirit has placed in my life to feed me and has allowed me to feast on during this great and holy fast. Looking back over this post it seems so rigid and dry. Believe me when I say this is anything but dry. These wells are full of living water which the Lord pours out to me. I drink to partake of the Lord and distance myself from the flesh. I drink often and deep. I feel as though I must drink or I will die! I have to sing the songs of Zion. I have to pray the prayers of God's people. I must recite the symbol of the faith!! The Lord has given us these good gifts to bring life and health and freedom to our souls. This they have brought to my soul. If it wasn't for these gifts of grace I shudder to think how much more offensive and mean I would be. Yes, I am still frustrated and angry but these gifts feed me in this desert. I'm looking at making changes to help eliminate some of this angst but until the Lord leads in those decisions I must rest in these gifts. I must grab them and not let go. I don't care if I am charged with using them as a crutch because it seems as if that's what they are for now.


May our God - the Giver of good gifts grant you all things on which to feast during this holy fast!!

- Ben

Lent I

Today for my devotions I was reading a community reader that our seminary puts out each season and the entry really spoke to me. I would like to share that entry here. I don't want to appear pompous by posting the work I did, but I really liked today's reading. Yes, it has my favorite quote from one of my favorite fathers of the church but God really spoke to me through it today so I thought I would share it. Here is today's (Feb. 22) entry:

Opening Prayer:
Almighty Father, who didst inspire Simon Peter, first among the apostles, to confess Jesus as Messiah and Son of the living God: Keep thy Church steadfast upon the rock of this faith, that in unity and peace we may proclaim the one truth and follow the one Lord, our Savior Jesus Christ; who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.
- BCP 187

Luke 9:18-27 NRSV
Once when Jesus was praying alone, with only the disciples near him, he asked them, "Who do the crowds say that I am?" They answered, "John the Baptist; but others, Elijah; and still others, that one of the ancient prophets has arisen." He said to them, "But who do you say that I am?" Peter answered, "The Messiah of God." He sternly ordered and commanded them not to tell anyone, saying, "The Son of Man must undergo great suffering, and be rejected by the elders, chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and on the third day be raised." Then he said to them all, "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will save it. What does it profit them if they gain the whole world, but lose or forfeit themselves? Those who are ashamed of me and of my words, of them the Son of Man will be ashamed when he comes in his glory and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels. But truly I tell you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see the kingdom of God."

Reading:
Come fire, cross, battling with wild beasts, wrenching of bones, mangling of limbs, crushing of my whole body, cruel tortures of the devil – only let me get to Jesus Christ! Not the wide bounds of earth nor the kingdoms of this world will avail me anything. I would rather die and get to Jesus Christ, than reign over the ends of the earth, That is whom I am looking for – the One who died for us. That is whom I want – the One who rose for us…What I want is God’s bread, which is the flesh of Christ, who came from David’s line; and for drink I want his blood: an immortal love feast indeed!
- St. Ignatius of Antioch, Epistle to the Romans 5:3-6:2; 7:3


Prayer of Response:
Holy Father, you know our hearts and our desires. You know that often we fail in our pursuit of you. Though we are frail, give us strength. Though we fall, lift us up. Though we fall short all too often, empower us for the journey on which you have called us. Help us to live as those who have gone before us, willing to give our life and our all for the cross of Christ. Help us to bear the holy cross. Amen.

I promise not to continue to post the whole entries from the reader and to share more of my thoughts through this lenten season.


Blessings to you all,

Ben

Ash Wednesday - Lent Begins

"O Lord and Master of my Life, take form me the spirit of sloth, despair, lust of power, and idle talk. But give rather the spirit of Chastity, humility, patience, and love to thy servant. Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own transgressions, and not to judge my brother, for blessed are Thou, unto ages of ages. Amen"

- Lenten Prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian.

On Easter

So Becca asked me to post some thoughts on Easter (cf. The comments under the "Beaux Arts Ball" post) and I really don't feel like I have anything profound to write about. So I hope I don't disappoint anyone with the lack of profound insights but here are some of my thoughts ranging from Easter and the events surrounding Easter.

As weird as it may seem, I'm actually sort of sad that lent is over. I know, it's weird, a time of mourning and fasting a time where the church has traditionally (mainly the Catholics and not the Orthodox or Protestants) prohibited the use of "Hallelujah" - you wouldn't think I'd be sad about this time ending. Especially with the fact that Lent ends on my favorite Church holy-days of all time - Easter Sunday. Don't get me wrong, I love the joyful time of living in Eastertide (the season after Easter and before Pentecost) I love Easter, and I don't particularly enjoy fasting, but I still am sort of sad that Great and Holy Lent is over. There is something very special about traveling through life in those 40 days of intense concentration and humility. There is something unique about living out 40 days in a mystical desert. Maybe it's that I learned a lot during this Lent, maybe it's that I like the somber feel of it, I'm not really sure, but I do know that I am torn between the joy of Eastertide and the ache of Lent. I think that's why both of these are so essential to our church calendar (something a majority of Protestantism has completely neglected).

Easter was great though. Although I spent a lot of the weekend on the road, driving back home and then back to KY, it was good to get home and visit family and friends. It was interesting being back in a protestant church, but I don't think I could have picked a better situation. I love my home pastor and I don't know if I've ever met a better pastor than he. I only wish that he would have came to Port while I was still a full-time attender there. It was definitely different, but good to be back. I also find it hard to sit in a pew on a Sunday like Easter Sunday. There is so much joy and so much energy just flowing through me it was all I could do just to remain silent and sit in the pew. I so badly wanted to just get up and start preaching. This isn't to say that Pastor Beckley did a bad job, on the contrary, he did an excellent job as always, but there is so much I want to convey that it still pains my heart to be silent in church - especially in a protestant church. I think it pains me more in a protestant church because I know that I can serve there. In the Orthodox Church I attend I know from the outset that I have no authority and it would be wrong for me to speak as one with authority to these people so it doesn't really burn within me as much there, but when I go to a protestant church I just want to shout it out.

I don't want to critique Pastor Beckley because as I said his sermon was heartfelt and truly a word from the Lord, but I feel like the things that were running through my heart and mind were not conveyed how I would convey them. This is probably just a difference in personalities, but either way it gives me a small opportunity to pontificate here.

What my heart wanted to scream was along these lines although these are admittedly very raw ideas that would need some polishing. And this "list" is by no means meant to symbolize any of my thoughts of Pastor Beckley's sermon.

Although the Church does a good job at celebrating Easter I feel we do a poor job of internalizing Easter. I wanted to scream and shout at the top of my lungs, I wanted to convey the truth that Easter is not just the rising of Christ. Easter is the beginning of the end of time. The pinnacle of human history happened that Easter Sunday 2,000 years ago. Jesus Christ conquered death and with that he initiated the final age of the world. His resurrection does not just mark the start of a movement, but truly was (as the gospel writers indicate) the highest point of all human history. This is it! This is all we could ever hope for and imagine. God enfleshed conquering death, conquering sin! I wish I could convey the excitement that fills my heart as I meditate on this and write these words. I am just baffled every year at how the Church can just go about her Easter 'celebration' in such a nonchalant way. This is the essence of everything we are and hope to be. We live in this reality. We worship because of this event. We can have hope in life and amidst death because of this glorious act. I can't even describe the joy and excitement in my heart. That's why I want to scream and shout. I want to help people to realize what this means for them, for the church, for humanity. This isn't just something that happened and is over. This is a living reality! Christ did not rise (completed past tense) but "he is risen" (past action that continues through to the present). So many Christian's treat Easter with no excitement, no joy and no holy fear and trembling. It's like we pass the same judgment on the celebration of Easter that Pope Benedict (I think it was Benedict or maybe John Paul) said of Mel Gibson's Passion - "it is was it is." How can we live in such apathy toward the highest holy day of the year? "It just baffles me" (and yes that was a Madden reference). My heart is warmed every time I think on these things. I don't understand it and it brings me to the verge of tears - both of sadness and frustration. Sadness because of the state of the church and frustration because I don't know how, as a future minister, to convey this joy to people. How can we do it? How can we help people to realize that this is it! This is our life-long curriculum. We are called to live and to learn in the shadow of the cross and the empty tomb everyday of our Christian lives.

This life-long learning about how to live in the reality of Easter is why it is so vitally important for us to remember that every Sunday, every Sunday of the year is like a mini-Easter. This is why the ancient Christians decided that we should meet on Sunday rather than the Sabbath (Saturday). They knew that Easter was the center of life and thus every week we meet and celebrate the resurrection as a community of faith. We learn the curriculum of the resurrection every Sunday, or at least that's what Church is supposed to be. [This could be a launching point for some of my anti-church growth/seeker church sentiments but we'll save that for another day, but feel free to insert them yourselves.] We are people of the resurrection, that is our identity, and that is how we ought to define ourselves. Is it any wonder that the early believers greeted one another with the statement "he is risen" and the response "he is risen indeed." This didn't start as a Easter Sunday ritual, it started as an everyday ritual to identify believers. We are identified by the resurrection! This is who we are and thus it should effect every ounce of our being - especially the way we remember the resurrection.

So I guess I had more thoughts on Easter than I realized, they're more just out of the normal "Easter meditations" box.

~ Ben

Lenten lesson 101

Ok, so there have been so many things I've wanted to post about since lent started but haven't had the time to sit down and write out a long post. Hopefully I'll post on them later, but I wanted to post this quick thought while it's fresh. I attend St. Athanasius Orthodox Church in Nicholasville, KY on Sundays and find the liturgy to be incredibly meaningful. During lent we are using the Liturgy of St. Basil and in one of the sections there is a place for a different song to be sung each Sunday. This isn't like special music, the whole service is singing except the sermon, this is more like instead of singing "O for a Thousand Tongues to Sing" at the start of every school year at Houghton they mixed it up once in a while with "And Can it Be." As I stood there yesterday listening to the choir (again not like typical protestant choirs) sing the song I heard these words. I'll try to quote them the best I can.

"The flaming sword of Eden has been extinguished by the wood of the cross...enter in to paradise!"

Isn't that beautiful! The imagery just fills my heart. Only with God could something so paradoxical become a reality. Wood extinguishing fire? Death bringing life in paradise? These are not intuitive things. Truly the cross is foolishness and a stumbling block and yet all the more we proclaim Christ and him crucified! Just as the first Adam's actions removed us from paradise, so the second Adam's actions allow us to reclaim it, or better yet, recieve a new one.

Amen. Come Lord Jesus.

Thoughts on Ash Wednesday

Just some short thoughts from Ash Wednesday.

Today in chapel we had the traditional imposition of ashes. When the ashes were imposed on my forehead in the sign of the cross these words were spoken to me (or at least very close to these) "from dust you came, to dust you will return, now go and live in the shadow of the cross." Wow, such powerful words. Ash Wednesday is about us, about our sin, and about God breaking into history through the incarnation to mend the brokenness and redeem humanity.

One "profound" thing that really struck me today was this. I often forgot I had ashes on my forehead during the day. It was often only when I saw the cross on someone else's forehead that I remembered that I too was living in the reality of being marked by the cross. It seems to me that this experience beautifully symbolizes the body of Christ. Sometimes when things get rough or when life gets hard we forget that we are living lives that are marked by the cross. We forget that we are really the living dead because "those who are baptized are already dead" (JD Walt). Sometimes it takes the community of faith, the great cloud of witnesses, to remind us of the shadow that we live in. Oh that the true cross that we carry was as visible to everyone as the ashes that we wear on our foreheads. We are truly a people marked by the cross, that is what our baptism represents, that is the pinnacle of our existence. We are people of the cross! May that marking permeate all aspects of our lives.

LENT!!

Lent starts tomorrow!

Yes that's right tomorrow is Ash wednesday. I never understood the church seasons or the various holidays other than Christmas and Easter, until my junior and senior years at Houghton. I have now come to embrace the Christian Calendar as a means to focus and live the Christian life throughout the year. After reflecting on the Christian Year for a little while now I have come to realize that Lent is by far my favorite season and Easter my favorite holiday.

I love the stark, somber mood that inhabits lent as we "descend to the cross with Christ" as JD Walt said in chapel the other day. We start our descent on Wednesday with the imposition of ashes (tomorrow will be my second time) and maintain our time of reflection through prayMer and fasting until Easter Sunday when we loudly exclaim CHRIST IS RISEN!! HE IS RISEN INDEED!!

Praise the Lord!! Amen!

I hope to post some lenten thoughts throughout the 40 days (not counting sundays), but we'll see how that goes as I have a NT Theology paper due for Dr. Witherington in a month. But for now, I just wanted to share my joy and excitement that Lent is here and Easter is coming.

Isn't it a great reminder of the reality that we live in. Just as before Easter the earth cried out for atonement, so it is after Easter that the earth cries out for the return of the King.

And so my soul yearns within me, and crys out even more during this time of year - MARANATHA - Come Lord Jesus!!!